


Phooey and Kablooie comment/complain about the Hiatus.

by KingFranPetty



Series: Kablooie and Phooey in Non Canon! [5]
Category: DuckTales (Cartoon 2017)
Genre: Breaking the Fourth Wall, Commentary, Cussing, Dialogue, Dialogue Heavy, Fourth Wall, Gen, Not Canon Compliant, Short One Shot, Swearing, Talking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-19
Updated: 2020-09-19
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:26:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 25
Words: 16,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25982062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KingFranPetty/pseuds/KingFranPetty
Summary: A do nothing story.
Relationships: Phooey Duck & Kablooie Duck
Series: Kablooie and Phooey in Non Canon! [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1776496
Comments: 52
Kudos: 2





	1. Titles

Phooey Duck: Hiiiiiii! We are going to discussing over a few topics. Season Three, The new episode titles.

Kablooie Duck: FUCK that, we are complaining about the hiatus. This SHIT is forever for us but it won't even be noticed by our family. God fucking damn it, It is a real Fucking pain to be aware of the Fourth Wall!! You could never understand what it means to be fictional, Human, I wake up and every single day...

Phooey Duck: Kablooie, I swear I'm telling that you said a bad word to Mommy and Unca Donald!

Kablooie Duck: I'm having an Existential Crisis, God Fucking Dammit!! I SWEAR To FUCK, I thought you understand that... I'm sorry, it's just that existing is horror and pain.

Phooey Duck: Just don't yell at me anymore or I... I won't hang out with you anymore because you are mean.

Kablooie Duck: Is this about me trying to kill Scrooge yesterday?

Phooey Duck: No. Maybe.. Yes.

Kablooie Duck: I'm not a villain, Scrooge just doesn't care about anyone more than his money. Seriously, he hasn't paid for your therapy yet even tho he said he would think about it. Whenever I ask, he just claims it's about "not giving free handouts."

Phooey Duck: Unca Scrooge is our Family! Aren't you supposed to love your family?!

Kablooie Duck: Family? Family?? Scrooge McDuck would rather watch all our futures burn for temporary profits over considering even one other person's opinion.

Phooey Duck: He is our family, why can't you understand that?

Kablooie Duck: Avoiding the issue now, let's talk about Season Three Of Ducktales!

Phooey Duck: Kablooie, face the issues in our relationship! You can't ignore these things and hope they disappear.

Kablooie Duck: I wasn't here for a lot of this season so I don't have much to say about it personally. Especially since I don't involve myself with very many people outside of Phooey. However I do like Webby and I am very excited about Gosalyn appearing. Still the news that Negaduck won't be in this season is disappointing to me on a very personal level because I was planning on killing him. You know, Idols and their fans. Haha.. Ha.

Phooey Duck: Well actually, I'm very excited for Season Three. I was really hoping for some more development for my character. At first I was worried because Quack Pack and F.O.W.L. being the season Antagonists. Even the latest episodes have gotten me feeling worse for wear. From not being included or questioning my morals. Still, I do really hope this season will get me some forward movement. Ever since Last Christmas, I kinda feel like I'm moving backwards... Wait. Hey! Acknowledge our family issues Kablooie!!

Kablooie Duck: Who wants to see the new episode titles?

Phooey Duck: Wow! How did you get those?! I normally don't see the titles until the episode already starts. It's actually a little stressful because we are mid start or something into a day then there's a title like "Mysterious Mystery," "Scary spook," or "Totally not going to be traumatic!"

Kablooie Duck: Yeah yeah, pay attention to the episodes. So anyways, they should be up now. Here's the first.

Phooey Duck: The Phantom and The Sorceress?.. Oh. Oh no.

Kablooie Duck: Oh fucking great, This asshole.

Phooey Duck: I thought that. I thought. I thought we weren't going to deal with this so soon. I thought F.O.W.L. was an end of season thingy like the Moonlanders!!!

Kablooie Duck: Ah Shhhhh. Sh. Phooey, breathe that's like 4 weeks away. These are just titles. We don't know what will happen. Maybe it's just very misleading.

Phooey Duck: No! You don't understand, they are going to hurt me again. They are going to take me away from Mommy, and Unca Donald, and Unca Scrooge, and my big Bwuddas! They are going hurt me and there's nothing I can do because nobody will believe me about the Scary Vultures!!

Kablooie Duck: Listen, don't cry. It's going to be fine. I'm sure Huey can listen to reason. Now if we can just prove what's happening then maybe..

Phooey Duck: They'll hurt him too because The Scary Vultures are big and Scary!! 

Kablooie Duck: No, if he knows then he can convince the adults. They know Huey is smart so they have to believe him, more so as we can both back him up with proof.

Phooey Duck: It's never going to be fine. They are going to come and take me away so Scary Vultures can hurt me.

Kablooie Duck: I'm going to put the next one up. Hopefully it isn't going to trigger your PSTCD or something. 

Phooey Duck: They put a Moonlander on Earth?

Kablooie Duck: It's a Penny Episode! You like Pen Pen, right?

Phooey Duck: She thinks I'm too weak and would have died for the sin of weakness on the Moon... But she also thinks I'm part Moonlander sooo.

Kablooie Duck: Ah.. A complex relationship with conflict that hits too close to home for me... Oh great.

Phooey Duck: What about you? I've never seen you interact with Penumbra before.

Kablooie Duck: Yeahhh, we met once. We fought. She almost killed me but that was normal. I respect her strength so far but the whole refusing to murder me thing was sort of a let down.

Phooey Duck: Wait. She almost What?

Kablooie Duck: You are a soft boy, You won't understand rough and tough stuff. Besides, what's the point of a fight if I don't almost die or kill someone?

Phooey Duck: Please stop trying to murder to be murdered by adults in our life. Please.

Kablooie Duck: No.

Phooey Duck: Please Bwudda.

Kablooie Duck: Nope.

Phooey Duck: I don't want to lose you, please.

Kablooie Duck: Still No.

Phooey Duck: Please! 

Kablooie Duck: Next episode title is... The trickening... Lame.

Phooey Duck: Halloween?

Kablooie Duck: Wait, Halloween episode? Ooh!

Phooey Duck: You suddenly sound excited, are you going to dress up?

Kablooie Duck: Yeah! I'm going as Negaduck and I'm going to scar someone for life!

Phooey Duck: I'm going as... Wait. Kablooie! Don't go traumatizing people!!

Kablooie Duck: But Mom said that I can't do a blood sacrifice to an old, dead, god for revenge against all who have wrong me. Then Donald said that I can't make a real life horror movie by finding some teens in the woods and turning them into gory puddles on the ground. So what am I suppose to do?

Phooey Duck: You can help me, Huey, Louie, and maybe Dewey not be scared during Halloween?

Kablooie Duck: But I wanna hurt people.

Phooey Duck: But what if the Scary Vultures come after us?

Kablooie Duck:... I'll help you get a costume.

Phooey Duck: Thank You, Bwudda Kablooie.

Kablooie Duck: This next title is too long.

Phooey Duck: Oh, another Isabella Finch episode. Seems to be about the Youth fountain.. Maybe?

Kablooie Duck: If that damn thing isn't like the original Ducktales version where it only reflects a younger self then I'm going to see if I can drown McDuck in it before he dies of being a pre egg. Even if it is, I'm still going to drown him in it.

Phooey Duck: If you drown him, F.O.W.L. will get his money and probably rule the world.

Kablooie Duck: You know. I'm actually weaker if I am in water for too long so I'll just not. 

Phooey Duck: Good. :)

Kablooie Duck: How do you say that out lou... Never mind. Next title!

Phooey Duck: Huh. Let's get Dangerous?? I thought you said Jim wouldn't be in this season?

Kablooie Duck: GOSALYN WADDLE-MEYER MALLARD MCQUACK!!

Phooey Duck: Woah! Someone is uncharacteristically cheerful about something other than arson, murder, revenge, or me.

Kablooie Duck: Quiverwing Quack!!!

Phooey Duck: I thought you HATED all superheroes because "They are basically cops since the ones here are paid by Scrooge McDuck." Yet... This interested you??

Kablooie Duck: Gos!

Phooey Duck: Kablooie? You... There?

Kablooie Duck: Gosalyn!!

Phooey Duck: Ummmm. 

Kablooie Duck: Oh I hope she punches me in the face she when we meet! I'm just so excited to finally meet her!

Phooey Duck: Ah. There's my bwudda... Don't we already have plenty of girls who can fight you?

Kablooie Duck: Well There's Webz but she's into Lena. There's Lena but she's into Webby. Violet prefers books to bloodshed. Penumbra is an adult and into Mom. Mom won't fight me because she's thinks I'm a baby. Beakley wants me to stop setting things on fire. Daisy is into our Uncle Donald. Goldie is more about money. Magica knows I'm going to burn the witch. Ma Beagle would rather use her own children. Fenton's mom is a cop and is still angry about the Arson.

Phooey Duck: I get the point... What if Gosalyn likes girls?

Kablooie Duck: What?

Phooey Duck: What if Gos doesn't like you back? You clearly wish to fight her because you like fighting but what if she only likes girls?

Kablooie Duck: What does that have to do with me wanting Gos to vibe check me into season four?

Phooey Duck: I regret you only hanging with Dewey for lingo... So you said you like Webby cause she can beat you up but you don't ask her to fight because she's into Lena. Right?

Kablooie Duck: Yeahhh?

Phooey Duck: What if Gosalyn also likes girls?

Kablooie Duck: Well then I'd have to get use to the idea of hanging with girls more but it won't matter because they are able to fight me.

Phooey Duck: I'm sure Gos won't paint your nails like Webby did.

Kablooie Duck: God, FUCK. If I'm going to wear a skirt, it better be a battle skirt. You know? Like sure, pink knife dress sure. Kilts are great.

Phooey Duck: I like being pretty.

Kablooie Duck: And I'm proud you are happiest like that but I just want revenge and arson. Okay? 

Phooey Duck: Shouldn't we be moving on to the next title?

Kablooie Duck: Oh yeah! Let us see. Escape from the impossibin? The bin with the cool, too dangerous, magic stuff that Scrooge banned everyone from?

Phooey Duck: Didn't we already have an episode in there? Are you sure it's not something else? 

Kablooie Duck: POWER.

Phooey Duck: Kablooie? 

Kablooie Duck: Don't you see, Phone? There'll be enough powers in there for me to DESTROY Scrooge McDuck, FOWL, and everyone who wronged you or me. We could Destroy Them All.

Phooey Duck: Um. Kablooie, we talked about using dark magic to avenge and gain power. You Can NOT. So please don't.

Kablooie Duck: There'll be so many ways to finally to end that penny pincher. I can almost taste Roast Duck.

Phooey Duck: I'll tell, I swear!

Kablooie Duck: Shhhhh, no.

Phooey Duck: I will! I'll tell mommy and Unca Donald and Duckworth and Miss Beakley!!

Kablooie Duck: Eat the rich, Phooey. Eat The Rich.

Phooey Duck: That's it! I'm gonna tell Unca Scrooge that you are planning to murder him aloud again!

Kablooie Duck: Phooey! Phooey, listen we have to eat the rich or we will all DIE!! Wait! I know the finer points of Capitalism is lost on you because you are 12 but... Just end here. I have to talk to him.

The End.


	2. The Waiting Time Part 1.

Phooey Duck: This Hiatus is taking a while.

Kablooie Duck: I know.

Phooey Duck: What are we going to do?

Kablooie Duck: I don't know... Talk maybe?

Phooey Duck: I like that idea.

Kablooie Duck: What are you going as for Halloween?

Phooey Duck: If Unca Scrooge pets my head and calls me His Treasure then I will go as gold. If he doesn't agree to do that when I ask. Then I'll go as... Myself from before in the olden days.

Kablooie Duck: That's dumb. You are already yourself.

Phooey Duck: If I go as myself then you can dress as yourself and we'd match.

Kablooie Duck:.. That's actually something I'd love to do.

Phooey Duck: Yay! 

Kablooie Duck: But I think you should match my Negaduck costume instead doing something for that old bastardized money bag, dress up as like Nega Gos.

Phooey Duck: No. Besides Negaduck was mean to Nega-Gosalyn.

Kablooie Duck: Then go as Gizmoduck.

Phooey Duck: No, There's no way Huey won't go as Gizmoduck.

Kablooie Duck: Then go as... Nega Launchpad.

Phooey Duck: You know... I'm sure nobody will get our reference. I don't want to have a costume no one gets.

Kablooie Duck: Weak!

Phooey Duck: I think I'll go as Phantom Blot's Daughter's sidekick. So even if nobody gets it, I'll be showing my friend support.

Kablooie Duck: No. Go as Darkwarrior Duck.

Phooey Duck: No way, I'm not going as that dictator police state in a million dollars!

Kablooie Duck: I want to match with you.

Phooey Duck: Then say you are a villain and that I'm your stolen loot.

Kablooie Duck:... You are smarter than I give you credit for.

Phooey Duck: Thanks!

Kablooie Duck: What's your opinion on Gladstone Gander?

Phooey Duck: He's my least favorite out Fethry, Donald, Kildare, Scrooge, Ludwig, and the other Uncas. 

Kablooie Duck: Ouch! Why's that?

Phooey Duck: Whenever I try to explain the problem of my powers to him. I thought because he has his luck that he could understand. Yet, no matter what he would view his luck as great and refuse to acknowledge his cursed existence.

Kablooie Duck: Cursed??

Phooey Duck: Come on!! Think, Kablooie! Unca Gladstone is always isolated from our family, his parents died, his relationships fail, and everyone wants to use him or views him like a freak show! Even back when, Donald hated him and the only girl he liked other than Magica was Daisy who. Guess what! Is Donald's soul mate!!

Kablooie Duck: I didn't really think about his luck that way.

Phooey Duck: Nobody does!! Not even Gladstone it seems. I just get so frustrated because he won't understand and it's just... Darn! Maybe I can talk to him.

Kablooie Duck: I'm going to try to set Magica De Spell on fire.

Phooey Duck: Please don't.

Kablooie Duck: Capitalist, Pedos, and Abusers burn.

Phooey Duck: Please, No.

Kablooie Duck: B U R N T H E WITCH! 

Phooey Duck: That won't help Lena Saberwing McDuck Not De Spell!

Kablooie Duck: She deserves revenge. If she won't do it herself than I WILL.

Phooey Duck: I'll tell if you do!

Kablooie Duck: Okay, I won't... (In front of you.)

Phooey Duck: Hey, I thought of another question. What do you want out of the rest of Season 3 and Season 4?

Kablooie Duck: I want to make The Buzzard Brothers suffer.

Phooey Duck: No, not what I was asking.

Kablooie Duck: Then what?

Phooey Duck: I mean like for character development and the story itself.

Kablooie Duck: I want to become more powerful and make the leadership of F.O.W.L SUFFER.

Phooey Duck: That's not character development, Kablooie.

Kablooie Duck: Then what is?

Phooey Duck: Changing for better or worse.

Kablooie Duck: Changing to grow as a person? That's lame, I want to be just manly and powerful.

Phooey Duck: You know I don't want to blame the person for the society but don't you think you are conforming to the patriarchy by identification with toxic masculinity?

Kablooie Duck: Umm. Phooey, I and Huey and maybe Louie are supposed to know big words.

Phooey Duck: Webby knows big words.

Kablooie Duck: God Damn it Phooey.

Phooey Duck: Still I think you should try to view non masculine things as of value instead of only respecting ladies for displaying masculine traits. Think for a moment if there's a pattern in things you like that shows a dislike for feminine and a vaule for masculinity over all else.

Kablooie Duck: Are you calling me sexist!?

Phooey Duck: Haven't you considered that those traits aren't formed in a vacuum and while the one person can get better at not being sexist or so on it's source is ultimately more so society? No to completely any accountability as freedom of choice exists even in society.

Kablooie Duck: I don't understand what you are saying so I'm going to change the subject to pan/bi erasure. You know, I have noticed a lot of people saying someone is straight or gay. As if someone like you and me don't exist. For example Launchpad, Drake, Fenton, The Three Caballeros, and Dewey.

Phooey Duck: I agree that the people you used as an example are neither just straight and gay. I will note that The Three Caballeros are called gay as back in the day as there was limited words in the public knowledge to express not straight identities. Also it was in their song. However, who's saying these people are straight or gay?

Kablooie Duck: The humans. 

Phooey Duck: I don't like learning about... Them. It's already bad they are watching us right now.

Kablooie Duck: Oh Phooey. You don't have to be afraid of them. What they should be afraid of is me!

Phooey Duck: Why's that?

Kablooie Duck: Hahaha, They should figure that out by themselves besides if I told you it'd give you nightmares.

The End.


	3. The Waiting Time Part 2.

Phooey Duck: Kablooie?

Kablooie Duck: Hmm?

Phooey Duck: Do you like Floppsy, Cuddles, and Mr. Wiggles?

Kablooie Duck: Yes??

Phooey Duck: Did you touch Floopsy, Cuddles, and Mr. Wiggles?

Kablooie Duck:... Phooey, I'm not going to answer that.

Phooey Duck: So you did!!

Kablooie Duck: No! It's just weird to ask that!

Phooey Duck: You are being kissy kissy with my stuffed toys!

Kablooie Duck: No, I'm not!

Phooey Duck: You kissed them!!

Kablooie Duck: NO!

Phooey Duck: Then I guess you won't mind if I take them back.

Kablooie Duck:... Hey, to distract you, What's your plans for the rest of season 3?

Phooey Duck: Umm. Well. I was hoping that I could be strong and brave and smart and tough. That I'd grow out of my powers. Stop having nightmares about Christmas decorations and buzzards.

Kablooie Duck: Ah. Uh. Okay. That's not a good sign. Let us both hope the rest of this season is kind to you.

Phooey Duck: What?

Kablooie Duck: Never mind! Ha! Umm... What about season 4?

Phooey Duck: Well I'm not sure. I've never gotten to grow up or older so maybe that. Being a teenager in movies and stuff seems cool.

Kablooie Duck: Pfff! Being a teen sucks actually.

Phooey Duck: Come on, You don't know. You never been a teen.

Kablooie Duck: And I have never been hit by house but I would know it'd hurt.

Phooey Duck: Well, Mr. Wiggles agrees with me and doesn't kiss my plushies.

Kablooie Duck: Well, Mr. Wiggles, Floppsy, and Cuddles likes my hugs! They like when I snuggle them at bedtime.

Phooey Duck: They like my hugs too!

Kablooie Duck: You are a big dum dum and you don't know the relationship I have with those three.

Phooey Duck: Don't call me a dum dum, You Meanie Weenie!

Kablooie Duck: You are the mean one because you keep me away from my only friends who I love!

Phooey Duck: I'm going to tell that you kissy kissy my toys!

Kablooie Duck: You are a narc! Tattle tail!!

Phooey Duck: That's It!!

The End


	4. The Waiting Time part 3.

Phooey Duck: Where do you think Kildare is?

Kablooie Duck: Well... He's probably somewhere that F.O.W.L can't get him since Fethry heard his theory.

Phooey Duck: You know, Seeing as Fethry knows about The Buzzard Brothers. Maybe he can help.

Kablooie Duck: He's an adult. He won't help. No adults seem to help.

Phooey Duck: Oh Kablooie. Why are you being a sadie? Mom and Donald and Scrooge will help, normally you are the one saying that.

Kablooie Duck: Nobody helps or understands, we need to give up on them and take revenge to our own hands.

Phooey Duck: Kablooie, No.

Kablooie Duck: They won't understand us. They aren't cursed with our powers. You deserve to take what you are owned in blood.

Phooey Duck: Kablooie! I'm not interested!! You can't say that kind of thing. Stop it.

Kablooie Duck: You do. You deserve to take. Don't you want to be free of the vultures? Are not so angry about what happened?

Phooey Duck: I do what to be free. But I'll never be free if I give into the dark and vengeful thoughts. Sure, I am angry but I'm hurt and sad and ashamed.

Kablooie Duck: There's nothing to be ashamed of, You got hurt and the only ones to blame are the ones who hurt you.

Phooey Duck: Thanks, Kablooie. Still I am not interested in murder.

Kablooie Duck: You are a softie, just too innocent.

The End.


	5. The Waiting Time Part 4.

Phooey Duck: Kablooie?

Kablooie Duck: What?

Phooey Duck: Will you be with me forever?

Kablooie Duck:... Phooey, You know I can not answer that.

Phooey Duck: Are you going to die?

Kablooie Duck: Phooey. Please don't. I will not answer that kind of question.

Phooey Duck: Why are you about to die? Is it my fault?

Kablooie Duck: You... You did nothing wrong, I don't know how but when I entered this continuity there was just something different.

Phooey Duck: Different? Sure, every continuity is different but normally you can handle so much more than me. What could possibly be so different as to kill you?

Kablooie Duck: I don't. I remember being exactly the same as you and Huey and Dewey and Louie then the void and after that... After all that, all I can remember is boiling, hot, burning, rage.

Phooey Duck: Kablooie... I think I know what happened. I did it.

Kablooie Duck: Bullshit!

Phooey Duck: I wished on a monkey paw on accident on our birthday that you were here to help me.

Kablooie Duck: Wait, what?

Phooey Duck: I don't know why it did that but... But I can't deny it anymore. You are different from our years together and the lifetimes within. You gotten mean.

Kablooie Duck: Hah ha ha... Nice joke. What do you mean?

Phooey Duck: I remember who you really are even if you don't. You were rough, tough, bold even but now you changed into a bad guy.

Kablooie Duck: Phooey, that's nonsense. I'm a little bit murderous but you know I'm not a big bad villain like those people.

Phooey Duck: Do you remember anything about the before times? About who you use to be?

Kablooie Duck: Of Course I do!

Phooey Duck: Tell me then.

Kablooie Duck: I was strong, brave, tough, and... Huh.

Phooey Duck: And?

Kablooie Duck: Oh come on! We were a hivemind!! Clones. Fucking copies of each other. There wasn't different between us.

Phooey Duck: Uncle Donald always knew the difference between us. Even you and me.

Kablooie Duck: Listen, please Phooey! You shouldn't have to cry. Wait, don't back away from me. I'm your brother!

Phooey Duck: I wish you back so you would understand and protect me. I wished for my Bwudda Kablooie back on a monkey paw. You didn't come back, You aren't you, You don't even remember who you were! You look at our family like they are bugs wearing their skin!! You aren't my bwudda, The paw tricked me!!

Kablooie Duck: I am me! I'm still me!! Just give me a little more time. I'll be myself soon, just stop looking at me like I'm going to hurt you!

Phooey Duck: I wished for my bwudda back and the paw returned him... But he isn't himself, it brought back a Meanie Beans version! Who only hurts everyone!! And... And now he's gonna die so Kablooie might disappear forever..

Kablooie Duck: Phooey. You stop talking about that bs. I'm still Kablooie! I am! Just come here and..

Phooey Duck: OW! You are grabbing too hard, it hurts!

Kablooie Duck: I'm so very sorry to hurt you, please just stop trying to run away. It won't hurt so bad if you stop struggling.

Phooey Duck: Let go! Let go!! Ouch! Ow ow ow! Mommy!

Kablooie Duck: No you FUCKING don't, I'm not going to be grounded because you won't listen.

Phooey Duck: You are scaring me, let go. 

Kablooie Duck: No! I've been nothing but try to help you. Yet YOU won't listen or do what I say.

Phooey Duck: Stop grabbing so hard, it hurts.

Kablooie Duck: You don't know what's good for you. I am stronger and tougher so I know what's good for you.

Phooey Duck: No you don't! You sound like Unca Donald back when he hit us with a shoe.

Kablooie Duck: This new Donald is weak for not being like our real Uncle. He just lets these shallow copies walk all over him. Our real uncle Donald Duck is better.

Phooey Duck:... You are being scary. Please just let me go.

Kablooie Duck: No. Fight me for it. Do it.

Phooey Duck: You know I can't fight.

Kablooie Duck: You can, You just won't!

Phooey Duck: I cannot!

Kablooie Duck: FIGHT ME DAMMIT!!

Phooey Duck: Mommy! Unca Donald! Unca Scrooge!! Huey! Somebody help!!

Kablooie Duck: What are you going to do when they can't save you!? What about when nobody comes running to your tears!?! Fight me!!

Phooey Duck:(Words uncypherable due to crying)

Kablooie Duck: Stop crying and fight me for Fucking once god FUCKING damn it, You crybaby!!

Phooey Duck: You aren't my bwudda because my brother wouldn't hurt me!!

Kablooie Duck: Shut up! I am real. I am the real Kablooie! You don't get to decide if I'm really me!! You two shoes crybaby, You shut Fuck up right now!!!

Phooey Duck:(more crying causing words to be hard to understand)

Kablooie Duck: Stop crying and be a real man! A real duck wouldn't (the rest of the words are blocked by Kablooie having a meltdown and an existential crisis)

And Everyone suffered

The End!


	6. The Waiting Time Part 5.

So now, a format change.

Phooey Duck:*holding the monkey paw over the volcano* I have to destory it... It's the only way to make Kablooie okay.

Kablooie Duck:*bobs up out of the lava, floating in lava* Phooey! What are you doing?!!

Phooey Duck:*steps back* I have to destory the monkey paw, Kablooie!

Kablooie Duck:*glares*... *sighs* Phooey, You dumbass.

Phooey Duck:*shaking* Don't try to stop me!

Kablooie Duck:*sinks under the lava, muffled screams, comes back up* Phooey, put that thing back before you accidentally wish something!!

Phooey Duck:*shaking more while scared whimpering* Please don't hurt me, Bwudda.

Kablooie Duck:*sighs as he cools down in lava* Put it back, Phooey.

Phooey Duck:*walks up the edge, reaching out to drop the monkey paw* Please don't hurt me.

Kablooie Duck:*glares, dips sunglasses to glare harder* Put it back, I swear to FUCK!

Phooey Duck:*scared tone* No! This is the only way to save you. I have to!

Kablooie Duck:*breathes out* Damn it, Phooey.

Phooey Duck:*nervous* Don't you understand? I'm just trying to help you.

Kablooie Duck:*snarling tone* I.. AM. FINE THE WAY I AM!!

Phooey Duck:*backs off* You hurt our family, Kablooie. You aren't the same. You came back wrong!

Kablooie Duck:*growling duck noises* BULLSHIT!

Phooey Duck:*tears up* I just want my bwudda back.

Kablooie Duck:*fuming* I am your brother. I am *rages and throws temper tantrum* Real! I'm real, I'm real dammit!! I am god damn Fucking REAL!!

Phooey Duck:*crying* I just wish I had my bwudda Kablooie back!!

Kablooie Duck:*horrified* Oh god damn it.

The End. 


	7. The Writing Time Part 6.

Phooey Duck:*sad* I'm sad.

Kablooie Duck: I know, this Hiatus is taking so long.

Phooey Duck: No, that's not why I'm sad.

Kablooie Duck:*somewhat surprised* Huh? What are you sad about?

Phooey Duck:*scared and sad* I'm afraid of F.O.W.L. because the next episode is going to have them.

Kablooie Duck:*pained* Oh.

Phooey Duck:*sniffles* The Scary Vultures told everyone to come and find me so they can kidnap me.

Kablooie Duck:*attempting to be comforting* I'm sorry, Phooey.

Phooey Duck:*curls up* I am scared, Bwudda.

Kablooie Duck:*looks down and tries to think of something to help* Umm... Uh.

Phooey Duck:*wipes away tears* Will you be here?

Kablooie Duck:*worried* Well, I don't know... You kinda wished on a monkey paw so I just don't know.

Phooey Duck:*rubs the back of his head* Yeahhh...

Kablooie Duck:*looks off* I could die but it's unsure.

Phooey Duck:*sad* What if you aren't here when they come back?

Kablooie Duck:*unsure* I'm sure that Huey or Mom or Donald will help.

Phooey Duck:*looks off in hurt* You don't believe that.

Kablooie Duck:*pained* Listen, I am trying. I don't know the future.

Phooey Duck:*sniffles* I'm sorry but it's just so scary.

Kablooie Duck:*pats him comforting* I am here now.

Phooey Duck:*hugs him* Thank you, Kablooie.

Kablooie Duck:*hugs him back* Welcome, Phooey.

Phooey Duck:*worried* Do you think my wish did something bad?

Kablooie Duck:*shrugs* I don't know. I'm sure we'll find out soon.

Phooey Duck:*chuckles* Wouldn't it be funny if something good happened and all this worrying was for nothing?

Kablooie Duck: Eh. Not really?

Phooey Duck: Why?

Kablooie Duck: I don't like going through something bad to get nothing.

Phooey Duck: What about good nothing?

Kablooie Duck: What is a good nothing?

Phooey Duck: Nothing but its good.

Kablooie Duck: You are a strange creature, Phooey.

The End.


	8. The Waiting Time Part. 7

Dear Santa,

I know it's been a very very long time since I wrote to you because my uncle Scrooge McDuck doesn't like you very much. But I'm glad you did what I asked you to by bring back my mommy. I don't know how you did that. Thank you very much, Santa Claus, it means a lot to me and my big brothers. Still I have to ask more things from you, I am sorry if I'm asking for too much. Can you pretty pretty please with a cherry on top make sure The Scary Vultures not come over before or during Christmas? I know you have very little control over other people or after Christmas.

But can you pretty please not let The Buzzard Brothers come over? I promise that I will try my very best to keep my uncle Scrooge from trapping you. If you don't help me then I won't help you. I understand that this is kinda mean but you have to understand that I don't have a choice. The big scary vultures are going to hurt me and my family and everybody. If you were ever a good person then you must understand that I don't wanna be hurt. That I would do a lot to not get hurt by those big scary meanies. They didn't just hurt me like the other baddies, they hurt me differently.

Every single day, I fear Christmas getting closer. I use to love these holidays. I use to look forward to the winter. That has died, violently and painfully. My happiness and everything I believed I was died that Christmas day so many years old before my own birth. The night that I laid awake, laying in tears and pain and shame, was the worst night of my life. Sometimes, I return to that last Christmas and that night. Those moments are the moments in which I die. They haunt my nightmares every night.

Ever since, my love and joy of Christmas is tainted by horror. Horror that I feel in my heart and soul I will never truly understand or get over.

Please, for any goodness in your heart. Do not let those buzzards in Scrooge McDuck's mansion. Also, don't bring in any mistletoe. We won't have for in our house for a very very good reason.

PS, Kablooie helped me write this letter early so he told me to tell you what he wants for Christmas.

  * Coal
  * Matches
  * Gasoline
  * Lighter fluid
  * Firewood
  * Lighters
  * a Junior Woodchuck guide book
  * Fireworks
  * Bottles
  * Sulfur
  * His enemies to plead for mercy so he can say no? (He said it was opinional so don't)
  * Bunny plushies
  * A human heart (don't)
  * You to hurt Scrooge in a personal way (don't)
  * The humans' power of man's red fire so he can become human? He was unclear.
  * And more fire fuel.



With seasons greetings and much warmth, 

Phooey Duck and partly Kablooie Duck.


	9. The Waiting Time Part 8.

Phooey Duck: How long until The Phantom and The Sorceress?

Kablooie Duck:*thinks for a moment* Uhhhh. *counts for a moment then speaks* 3 weeks.

Phooey Duck:*surprised* That's not very long.

Kablooie Duck:*sad* Yeah... It's kinda sad to think about the passing of time especially now.

Phooey Duck:*confused* Oh? Why's that?

Kablooie Duck:*pained tone* Wellll... Think about this, we are fading away from the comics and the franchise as a whole.

Phooey Duck:*hurt* Oh... I get that. It's funny in a sad way, I understand this more than you in a way.

Kablooie Duck:*cocks eye*

Phooey Duck: You see, I've been noticing that we appear less and less. It has something to do those humans you are so obsessed with. They invent new things and that makes mistakes like us.

Kablooie Duck: Oh. Ow! It really does pain me to acknowledge we are ultimately mistakes.

Phooey Duck: It's not just that, think about this. We will likely lose all personality and independency before our existence disappears.

Kablooie Duck:Jesus Fucking Christ! That's a whole new Existential Crisis.

Phooey Duck:*explaining fear* Not just that! It's already happening!! You probably don't notice it because it's like asking a fish it's opinion on water but you in particular are fading away.

Kablooie Duck:*unsure* Huh??

Phooey Duck:*mild pain of existing tone* You don't appear as much. I appear more often than you. So I can notice this kind of thing. The gaps in our second to minute long lifetimes get longer and our many lifetimes get shorter.

Kablooie Duck:*mildly horrified* Dear fucking God... Real I Have No Mouth And I Must Scream stuff.

Phooey Duck:*sighs* Slowly as time passes and technology gets better, we are going to fade and fade away into nothing. Because... We are just mistakes to humans.

Kablooie Duck:*rubs back of head* God... *considers aloud* You know, I guess we'll die like humans. A rare feat for toons like us.

Phooey Duck:*pained breath of sadness* I kinda wish we were canon. That our creators saw us as something other than errors. It was nice to be a character for that one comic but...

Kablooie Duck:*thinking aloud* I wish we were canon too. It seems like it would be a good idea. You know, they really don't have much when it comes to the triplets. Before this show, they struggled with giving our brothers personalities. So why not try exploding the idea of extra triplets?

Phooey Duck:*notes* You know, as much as I love being a hivemind with my bwuddas. Being an independent person was neat. Heck, being a preteen was exciting in a odd way.

Kablooie Duck:*worn chuckle* Whelp! As much as death being permanent terrifies me in a way I don't fully understand, being canon for short time was new and entertaining.

Phooey Duck:*horrified laughing* The idea of dying and staying dead is terrifying! I don't want to die and the fact that that is possible for me as a toon is a nightmare nearly on par with my Vultures nightmares!! Hahahaha! *laughing turns to crying* I don't wanna die! I don't wanna die!! *sobbing*

Kablooie Duck:*unsure how to help* Umm. Phooey? Do you?... Do you need to...? Uhhh. *awkwardness*

Phooey Duck:*sobbing*

Kablooie Duck:*pats him awkwardly to comfort* There, there... Um. *suggests poorly* At least when you die, you'll die with me and you wouldn't have to suffer remembering those buzzards??

Phooey Duck:*sobs harder* I don't wanna die and I don't want remember the Scary Vultures!! I just don't wanna die!! *sobs too hard to speak*

Kablooie Duck:*lightly and awkwardly hugs him* Maybe we will be canon in later versions? It's possible that we won't die??

Phooey Duck:*hugs him, crying into him, rocking and shaking with emotional pain*

Kablooie Duck:*awkwardly snuggles him* Shhhhh. Shhhhhhhh. I'm here. We aren't going to die right now. We have the entire season three and a possible season four. Shhh.

Phooey Duck:*sniffles as he calms down a little bit

Kablooie Duck:*silently having an existential crisis as he ponders how much of his personhood is just those two monkey paw wishes*

Phooey Duck:*silent crying in fear of death*

Kablooie Duck:*nervous* Phooey? I know I am normally not much of an independent individual being but... Ummmm. Do you ever question if you are a person with free will?

Phooey Duck:*confused* We are fictional characters, Kablooie, we don't have free will.

Kablooie Duck:*having a breakdown on the inside now that he really thinks about it and has individual thought*

The End.


	10. The Waiting Time Part 9.

Phooey Duck:*yawns* Hey... Kablooie.

Kablooie Duck:*tired* Wat? 

Phooey Duck: We should probably plan what we are going to do in the coming episodes.

Kablooie Duck:*thinking for a moment* Hm... Good idea. 

Phooey Duck:*bored* Yeah. It'll probably help with the boredom.

Kablooie Duck:*nods dully* Yeahhh. Probably.

Phooey Duck:*sighs* Strange how the looming fear of death saps energy out of life. Ironic almost.

Kablooie Duck:*stretching* Whelp! *yawns* We still have to survive season three and maybe four.

Phooey Duck:*breathes out in boredom and tired*

Kablooie Duck:*picks up a piece of paper* Okay! So now to go over what we know about the next episode.

Phooey Duck: The Phantom and The Sorceress?

Kablooie Duck:*nods* Yep! Come on, Lightening Bolt!! Get electric!

Phooey Duck:*stretching*

Kablooie Duck:*looks back to the paper* So let's go to the basics. The title. We can within reason guess it will involve The Phantom Blot.

Phooey Duck:*considers that* Hmmmm. Yah. It might also involve Magica.

Kablooie Duck: Alright. So what should we expect with this episode and how can we survive it?

Phooey Duck:*thinking aloud* Well, I don't know much about this version of The Blot. I know he's the Mascot of Funso's Funzone. I do know he has a daughter and she's my friend.

Kablooie Duck: Then there's Magica De Spell. I'm not sure if she has her magic back but I have reason to think she has a vested interest in Scrooge's dime, Gladstone's Luck, and Lena.

Phooey Duck:*thought of something* Oh OH! 

Kablooie Duck:*Minecraft villager noise* ??

Phooey Duck: The Phantom Blot works for F.O.W.L and Magica works at Funso's Funzone which is a secret F.O.W.L. base so it might involve that!

Kablooie Duck: Ah. That's a good point. Always have to be aware of all the cards our enemies are holding.

Phooey Duck: So what do we have so far?

Kablooie Duck: The Blot has interest in kidnapping you or someone we care about and would benefit mildly from using Magica in this. Magica has reason to harm you or someone we care about and would benefit from FOWL's "help." FOWL is aware of Magica, You, Me, Our Knowledge about them, and Isabella Flinch's book which they might want. The Leaders of FOWL have multiple reasons to go after us and the people we care about...

Phooey Duck:...*scared* That's not good.

Kablooie Duck:*frustrated* Yep, this episode could go anywhere and will likely hit something like an atomic bomb.

Phooey Duck:*horrified* How do we prepare for something like that!? We don't even know if Magica will work with or against Funso!!

Kablooie Duck:*chuckles boldly* Well that means we're on equal footing.

Phooey Duck:*baffled* How?

Kablooie Duck:*proudly* Because regardless of how much power they have, we are an Ace Card and a wild card.

Phooey Duck:*scared and sad* I'm afraid we aren't playing poker or uno. This is possibly chess. There's no chance in chess, Kablooie. That's why it's the only game Unca Gladstone always loses.

Kablooie Duck: Phooey, You and I.. We are unpredictable. The fates can weave the future. Smart people can calculate the next move. However, nobody can truly lock down our actions or powers.

Phooey Duck:*panicked* This isn't a game! This isn't gambling or dice!! We are talking about grown ups who've had YEARS to consider every possibility, who have planned for everything, who are obsessed with ruining everything! Those Scary Vultures haven't made a move because they set up everything so they won't have to do anything until the killing blow! *tearing up* Don't you get it?!

Kablooie Duck:*gasps his shoulders and grins with malicious intention* Scrooge McDuck can be taken into account. The world can be simplified to letters and numbers. But! If season two taught me anything, it's that No One can take into account the element of Phooey. For better or worse, error exists in all systems. They might think they know exactly what can, could, should, or will happen but they are wrong. *confident* Because Phooey Duck Exists.

Phooey Duck:*smiles back* That's reassuring but your teeth make your smile threatening. *laughs a little bit* So what are we going to do?

Kablooie Duck: We are ducks, we will wing it.

The End.


	11. The Waiting Time Part 10.

Phooey Duck:*poking Kablooie* Kablooie. Kablooie.

Kablooie Duck:*annoyed* What?

Phooey Duck:*nervous* I had the vulture nightmare again.

Kablooie Duck:*sighs* Which one?

Phooey Duck:*worried* The one where the three of them cuddle me but they only talk about money and stuff I don't get.

Kablooie Duck:*searching for Floppsy* Can you tell me more?

Phooey Duck:*sits on a chair and fiddles which his hands nervously* They were talking about Unca Scrooge McDuck losing money trying to find mom.

Kablooie Duck:*stops* Oh. So only your two greatest traumas outside kidnappings and your powers? That's better than what I was expecting. 

Phooey Duck:*ashamed and anxiety noises*

Kablooie Duck:*pulls over a chair and tosses over Floppsy* Here Floppsy. Now Phooey. Let's talk, Capitalism.

Phooey Duck:*picks up Floppsy and hugs toy* What's capitalism?

Kablooie Duck:*sits down* So. Do you know what a political system is?

Phooey Duck:*thinking, answers unsure* Ummmmmm... A government?

Kablooie Duck: OK, so we should start with the basics.

Phooey Duck:*kicks feet and holds Floppsy for comfort*

Kablooie Duck: You are 12 soooo... Um. *ponders for a second then tries* Do you know what money is?

Phooey Duck: An Imaginary thing to exchange for goods and services?

Kablooie Duck:*Nods* Money is capital. *chuckles* And money rots the souls of men until the fires take us all.

Phooey Duck: That's a little morbid...

Kablooie Duck:*lights a match and puts it in his mouth* Not the worst part but hey. We are talking about how Scrooge McDuck can't go broke because he owns the world.

Phooey Duck:*tries to image spend all the money in the world and can't* That's... How much even is that?

Kablooie Duck:*harshly* Too much to not be corrupted. Do you remember the before times? On the world where mom still thought we were eggs? The one where duck kind landed on Pluto and that was a planet?

Phooey Duck:*smiles a little* That was so many lives ago. *frowns* It hurt to know mom was just getting back from Saturn's moon instead of Earth's.

Kablooie Duck:*firmly* It cost about 15 million dollars to go to Mars in that world. Do you know how many millions are in a billion?

Phooey Duck:*blanks* Ummmmmm. I don't know?

Kablooie Duck: They could have searched the entire moon on foot. Even given the case with the Moonlanders at the beginning of the search. Scrooge would still own more then any other person alive.

Phooey Duck: The Buzzards lied.

Kablooie Duck:*pats his shoulder* They always do. Does that help?

Phooey Duck:*smiles* Yeah. Kinda. Thanks.

The End.


	12. The Waiting Time Part 11.

Phooey Duck:*looking out the window* I like butterflies.

Kablooie Duck:*slams open the door* Phooey!

Phooey Duck:*looks to him*

Kablooie Duck:*gestures* We are getting your and my costumes early this year.

Phooey Duck:*smiles and excited tone* Where are we going?

Kablooie duck:*flatly* Costume store.

Phooey Duck:*cheers* Yay!

Time Skip~*·°★!

Phooey Duck:*holds up a costume with a dollar symbol* Would this work?

Kablooie Duck:*looking at his knock off Darkwing Duck costume with disappointment* It doesn't look like your old costume.

Phooey Duck:*Gets a bag of fake gold coins* That's not canon, besides can't using glitter on feathers.

Kablooie Duck:*nods* Makes sense. Maybe use some golden reflective tape so we can be taps on you.

Phooey Duck:*gets the tape, looks to him* That's a little purple to be Negaduck.

Kablooie Duck:*sighs* Yeah... I'm hoping I can get it more yellow. Maybe the dye will wash off given how cheap this is.

Phooey Duck: Well that's what happened to Jim. *suggests* I think there was a fake chainsaw somewhere here.

Kablooie Duck:*walking* Yeah, I'll check if they got it in red.

Phooey Duck:*follows him* How else would I make myself look like gold?

Kablooie Duck: Uhhhh... *pauses, gets some make-up* Here it's yellow and shiney so it should work.

Phooey Duck:*takes the makeup* Thanks, I've still got to find a yellow skirt. Meet you at the dressing rooms.

Kablooie Duck:*worried* Are you sure about a skirt?

Phooey Duck:*happily* It'll look pretty.

★*~Time Skip~*★

Kablooie Duck:*exits the changing room* Yuck! I look like Darkwing. *puts on the mask* Hopefully Phooey is right about the dye.

Phooey Duck:*exits the changing room, does a little spin and giggles* I'm so pretty, right Kablooie?

Kablooie Duck:*impressed with the fake chainsaw's real sounding chainsaw noises* Sure Phooey. God, I fucking love this shop. Too bad I can't have a real weapon.

Phooey Duck:*crosses arms* You weren't even looking. And Unca Donald said you are too dangerous to have real weapons.

Kablooie Duck:*turns off noises, looks to him* Too Dangerous? *smiles maliciously delighted* I'll show you dangerous, *grasps him* I'm gonna get ya! *tickles him* Shake it fear before Lord Negaduck!

Phooey Duck:*on the floor, laughing* Stop it! Stop it!!

Kablooie Duck:*sadistically* Say Uncle.

Phooey Duck:*shoves his hands away* No. I don't wanna.

Kablooie Duck:*pokes him with fake chainsaw* Do it.

Phooey Duck:*crosses arms and puffs* No.

Kablooie Duck:*drags Phooey* Taking the loot. It's all mine, none of you knobs can have it.

Phooey Duck: It's not even Halloween yet!

After some playing around.

Phooey Duck:*carrying his bag* Why Negaduck?

Kablooie Duck:*carrying his bag* Eh. He's not a hero and he seems murdery to me.

Phooey Duck: That's basically every villain.

Kablooie Duck:*adjusts sunglasses* And I'm the token evil teammate.

Phooey Duck: You aren't that evil.

Kablooie Duck: Then I'm villain coded.

Phooey Duck:*laughs* You are silly, Bwudda.

The End.


	13. The Waiting Time Part 12.

Phooey Duck:*jumping up and down on the bed, excited* Kablooie! Kablooie! Wake up!!

Kablooie Duck:*groans* No, give me another hour.

Phooey Duck:*unhappy* No! Wake up and play with me.

Kablooie Duck:*pulls up blanket over head, grumbles in grumpy* Get fucked, I'm trying to sleep.

Phooey Duck:*stands on bed and stares at him*

Kablooie Duck:*curls up*

Phooey Duck:*jumps off the bed and leaves*

Kablooie Duck:*tries to go back to sleep*

Phooey Duck:*suddenly hugging him* Kablooie... Kablooie, I wanna play.

Kablooie Duck:*fuming in rage*

Phooey Duck:*cuddles him* I wanna play right now. *yawns* Come on...

Kablooie Duck:*opens blanket and grabs him and pulls him in*

Phooey Duck:*shoves him away* Noooo! Stop that!!

Kablooie Duck:*cocoons him* No, You wanted to play. 

Phooey Duck:*puffs* I didn't want to play like this.

Kablooie Duck:*nuzzles him, then falls asleep*

Phooey Duck:*yawns, tired* Nooooo... I wanted to. *falls sleep*

The End.


	14. The Waiting Time Part 13.

Phooey Duck:*runs into the room* Kablooie!

Kablooie Duck:*setting popcorn on fire to* What is it, softie?

Phooey Duck:*panicking* I had a nightmare and I think it might be a message from the future!!

Kablooie Duck:*panicked putting out fire* You what!?!!

Phooey Duck:*explaining in stress* Yeah! I had a nightmare and I learned the third Buzzards name and it might also be a future message.

Kablooie Duck:*eating the burnt popcorn while looking for somewhere to talk* Wait wait, this important. I have to find somewhere.

Phooey Duck:*follows him*

Kablooie Duck:*pauses, checks the room to make sure F.O.W.L. isn't listening in* Okay, I think the humans are the only ones listening... Tell me.

Phooey Duck:*scared* It was super, duper, scary! Bradford Buzzard and Buford Buzzard were talking about you and Huey and me and which one they'd... "Get."

Kablooie Duck:*comforts him* You don't have to tell me anymore if t makes you uncomfortable.

Phooey Duck:*choked by because of crying* And they said that you would be added to a list so everyone would know to come after you. And they are going to take Huey away so they can hurt him! *sobbing*

Kablooie Duck:*holds him* Shhh, Phooey. I'm not going to let the big bad scary Vultures hurt you or anyone we love. I'm here right now.

Phooey Duck:*crying* They were... *sobs* They were wearing mistletoe and I was in Bradford's lap, they kept going on about This Christmas being "special" because they are going to to to *sobbing too hard to speak*

Kablooie Duck:*gets a blanket and wraps it around him* Would you like me to get Floppsy? *pets his head* I can get mama, would you prefer that?

Phooey Duck:*curls up on the floor and cries in trauma*

Kablooie Duck:*doesn't know what to do so just hugs him tightly*

Phooey Duck:*hugs back and just let's it all out*

Kablooie Duck:*attempts to be comforting* Your powers are rather convent, right. They gave a important message.

Phooey Duck: No! My powers are a curse!! They hurt me and everyone.

Kablooie Duck:*pats him on the back* They are so important, they always help us. You and your powers are valuable.

Phooey Duck: No! They are terrible. Magica possesed me for my powers and they almost killed Lena. She's like the most powerful magic user I know of!

Kablooie Duck:*cocks eye* What does Magica matter in this?

Phooey Duck:*grabs his shirt* Magica De Spell couldn't control my powers, Kablooie. I CAN'T CONTROL THEM! Nobody can!! I'm never gonna be able to control my powers!! *sniffles* Don't you get it?... My powers don't just solve the plot, they HURT people. I don't want powers, everyone wishes I never had them.

Kablooie Duck:*picks him up, shutting down a little because he can't fix the issues* Okay, the crybabies are having multiple mental breakdowns. So they need to hug mom and take a nap.

Phooey Duck:*having a temper tantrum and a meltdown at the same time while sobbing* I'm not a baby!! I'm 12 and I'm going to be 13 and I don't wanna be treated like like a little baby! I'm a PRETEEN, God FUCKING DAMNIT!!! *immediately claps hands over bill*

Kablooie Duck:*nervous chuckling* Somebody is out of character due to trauma. *silence breakdown, walking* I'm sure mom can help. Yeah...

Phooey Duck:*cries harder* I said a bad word and now Unca Donald and Unca Scrooge won't love me anymore! *curls into fetal position* No more trauma and anxiety please, I'm full.

Kablooie Duck:*silent infernal internal screaming of hell* Slow down there champ, I think we both need to rest today. *scared yelling as he exits room* MOM! Help!!! I think I accidentally broke the Phooey!!

The End.


	15. The Waiting Time Part 14.

Phooey Duck:*Looking at the episode title list* Kablooie, did you think of anything?

Kablooie Duck:*trying to plan Scrooge's murder without risking rising F.O.W.L to power* What do you mean?

Phooey Duck: I don't know... Like what if we don't even appear in the episode?

Kablooie Duck:*stares blankly in shock*

Phooey Duck:*nervous* Kablooie? Are you there?

Kablooie Duck:*shakes his head as he returns, looks to Phooey* Oh... Sorry, I just.. I didn't think of that.

Phooey Duck:*shrugs* Well. Maybe we just won't?

Kablooie Duck:*smiles in thought* That'd be great if we just didn't appear in the episodes that could get kidnapped by FOWL. Such an easy victory.

Phooey Duck:*scared* But then we won't know what they did and they'll get powerful without us knowing.

Kablooie Duck:*grabs head, stuffs head into desk, growls with rage hate*

Phooey Duck: We might need to make ourselves appear in the important episodes.

Kablooie Duck:*quits snarling* Huh?

Phooey Duck:*explaining while geasuring* We should follow every step to keep up. If we expect they'll always be fumbling to show our cards, then we'll miss half the moves. Does that make sense?

Kablooie Duck:*slowly holds up bomb* Like this?

Phooey Duck:*trying to put that back* Please don't.

Kablooie Duck:*hides murder plans for Scrooge* It's a little tiring to appear in every single episode.

Phooey Duck:*puts bomb in the "weapons box"* We should consider that but we won't have to.

Kablooie Duck:*eyeing the "weapons box" because he can't have it now* Listen, we can't know what episodes will be about so guessing what has those scumbags is not going to work out.

Phooey Duck:*grins* What if there was a way to know? A summary of every episode?

Kablooie Duck:*cocks eye* How?

Phooey Duck:*picks up a TV screen that has a bunch of things fused to it* Gyro gave me something so he can make sure it's you and me proof. *mimicking Gyro* "If it can survive you two then it'll survive anything."

Kablooie Duck:*already trying to set it on fire* Damn thing won't light.

Phooey Duck:*trying to turn it on* I'm sure Doctor Gearloose will be very glad to know you checked if I was fireproof. Anyways, it will help us see into other worlds.

Kablooie Duck:*not listening, looking for his metal bat* That chicken thinks he can make something I can't destory, I'll Fucking show him.

Phooey Duck:*trying to get the right channel* Why do things always turn to static on me?

Kablooie Duck:*makes sure to avoid Phooey as it hits it with a metal bat violently* DIE! I'LL FUCKING SHOW YOU!!

Phooey Duck:*smiles* Hey look, it started working.

Kablooie Duck:*breathes hard* Tell that bastard this thing is bat proof.

Phooey Duck:*nods* I will. Now, hopefully this can handle what I'm going to pull. *hand passes through the screen like it is made of water and searches*

Kablooie Duck:*looking for something to destroy the thing*

Phooey Duck:*pulls out some paper* Got it! *reading the papers*

Kablooie Duck:*pours water on it* Drown. Drown damn you.

Phooey Duck: And it's water proof. *goes back to reading*

Kablooie Duck:*carefully getting Phooey away as he tries pour acid on it* God fucking damn you, I'll kill you to death.

Phooey Duck:*looking at pictures* Rockerduck and Jeeves look *a little grossed out* different.

Kablooie Duck:*trying to stab the thing* Was that Phantom Blot with the infinity... Never mind, it's acid and stab proof.

Phooey Duck:*horrified* Is that Unca Donald getting hit with a beam? *turning page* Oh No, Unca Gladstone!

Kablooie Duck:*chuckles darkly* FUCK Gladstone, he was always a prick. *taping TNT to the thing*

Phooey Duck:*glares* Kablooie, Don't be a Meanie!

Kablooie Duck:*shrugs* Anyone who doesn't sympathize with you is my enemy. Besides, a good kick in the ass of losing his luck won't be different from a day of babysitting you.

Phooey Duck:*sighs* Don't use TNT in the house, Mom said so.

Kablooie Duck:*adding a very long fuse, opening a window* It won't be in the house. Not when I'm down with it. Gyro Gearloose is gonna see what I think of his creations being beyond my abilities to destory.

Phooey Duck:*Not paying attention because busy, sets one of the pages aside* Here's the summaries.

Kablooie Duck:*throws the thing out and explodes it* I am a force of nature, Gyro!!!

Phooey Duck:*surprised by loud noise* What was that?!!

Kablooie Duck:*beating chest and yelling out the window* Science can uncover the universe but understanding it requests acknowledging that you will never know everything, chicken SHIT!! *pulling back in the thing* Sorry, I was making a point.

Phooey Duck:*blinks dumbfounded* If you were any more villainous, I'd be worried I was helping you take over the world. Sometimes I wonder if I already am. *coughs and looks away* Anyways, have you read the episode summaries?

Kablooie Duck:*pulls in the thing to get angry it is fine* I have no interest in ruling the world. I don't think anyone should rule. *picks up paper and causally rambles* Besides, I find the nature of evil to be complex.

Phooey Duck:*checking the thing* What about redemption?

Kablooie Duck:*looks at photos* Redemption? Some people are beyond help or doomed from the start. Even since the monkey paw, I can't tell if my choices or a wish control me.

Phooey Duck:*sad* I'm sorry, I just wanted you back. *points out* Look at this, the summary of The Phantom and The Sorcress doesn't even bring up The Blot. It's just taking about Magica. What does that mean about FOWL?

Kablooie Duck:*holds up picture of The Phantom Blot then a picture of Magica doing magic* It means we still have other villains to worry about.

Phooey Duck:*worried* Uh oh.

Kablooie Duck: We need to plan for Magica attempting to posses you again.. Or me. Or Lena. Or getting the dime again.

Phooey Duck:*scared* Or gaining The Vultures' eye and then using that to get what she wants. Or kidnapping me so the Scary Vultures will help her and then they'll hurt me and then *panicking*

Kablooie Duck:*gets Mr. Wiggles, mimicking Mr. Wiggles voices* Heeeeeyyyyyy Phoooooooeeeeeeyyyy, it's meee. Mr. Wiggles, your frrrrrriieeeennnnndddddd. I'm here and, I'lllllllll protect youuu. Juss$$§§+ ‡€(( ^^£ |/\|)-(@±'$ ùú¶¶¶¶¶.

Phooey Duck:*looks to Mr. Wiggles* Mr. Wiggles? Mommy said you weren't really talking.

Kablooie Duck:*as Mr. Wiggles* MøMM¥ sæys that ß³çäūs3 §hê ¢ãñ'‡ h€år ^^³. *getting closer* †3[[ mmmmmmmmmm£€3³èéëêē w|-|ät'sssss$§ wr∅ⁿ9?

Phooey Duck:*sniffles* I'm so scared. Kablooie is still murdery and The Scary Vultures seem so impossible to stop. I tried wishing but everything I do seems to make it wrong and worse. I'm so alone and I just want everything to be fun and good again. Like before Last Christmas.

Kablooie Duck:*possessed by Mr. Wiggles* \/üL†Ūrèé$$$$§§§§§, €£££€£€333h? *unholy giggling* ÌÍ wwïīî |3ë ]=[@ )—(ÃĀ }÷{Ä¶|>¥ +°°°°°° ®!]) ‡H³M!!

Phooey Duck:*puts hands on hips* Wiggly! That's murder! That's bad and you can't.

Kablooie Duck:*still possessed by Mr. Wiggles* Oh... I'm sorry for suggesting it. I just want to help.*hugs him with toy's tentacles* Can we still be friends?

Phooey Duck:*hugs back* Of course.

Kablooie Duck:*manages to pull away from the stuffed toy and looks at it, starts crying in rage* Why don't you love me back, Mr. Wiggles?! 

Phooey Duck:*sees him* Kablooie?


	16. The Waiting Time Part 15.

Phooey Duck:*in the closet putting gold glitter and yellow reflective tape on the skirt he got* This is going to be so pretty.

Kablooie Duck:*goes over to Mr Wiggles* Hey... I want to talk about yesterday.

Phooey Duck:*pauses his glittering* Was that Kablooie?

Kablooie Duck:*fiddling with his hands*Listen, I want to tell you something. You can't tell Phooey about this. He won't understand.

Phooey Duck:*peers out of closet to listen*

Kablooie Duck:*looks to Mr. Wiggles* I'm not okay with you using my body but... I like you and I want you to like me too.

Phooey Duck:*puffs up quietly* I knew you were kissing my stuffies.

Kablooie Duck:*bents closer* Don't you like me too, Mr. Wiggles? *reaches to octopus squid* I do really like you and I'd be upset if you didn't.

Phooey Duck:*confused* What is he doing?

Kablooie Duck:*goes to kiss the stuffed octopus squid* Mr. Wiggles. Come on. Just let me.

Phooey Duck:*bursts into room* Kablooie!

Kablooie Duck:*hugging Mr. Wiggles* I wasn't kissing your toys, I swear!

Phooey Duck:*points at him* You are lying!

Kablooie Duck:*trying think of something to get out of this* Mr. Wiggles was trying to kiss me!

Phooey Duck:*narrows eyes* That is a lie. I know, I saw.

Kablooie Duck:*sighs* God this is like when we were playing Among Us.

{Flashback}

Phooey Duck:*in a yellow suit, following Kablooie Duck*

Kablooie Duck:*in a orange suit, following Louie's character to electric*

Phooey Duck:*doing task*

Kablooie Duck:*doesn't notice Phooey is there and just kills Louie's character*

Phooey Duck:*sees that*

Kablooie Duck:... *thinking to himself* God fucking damn it.

Phooey Duck:*reports it*

*return to present*

Phooey Duck:*crosses arms* That reference is going to be dated very quickly.

Kablooie Duck:*shrugs* It fits.

Phooey Duck:*stomps off* Well I'm telling that you kissed my plushies!

Kablooie Duck:*grabs him* Wait! Umm... There's only 11 days until the next episode. We still have to plan.

Phooey Duck:*surprised* It's here so fast.

Kablooie Duck:*lets go of him* Yeah and I should show you something. *leaves*

Phooey Duck:*waits*

Kablooie Duck:*comes back in Negaduck costume* I got the dye out. *spins* What you think?

Phooey Duck:*claps* Good job!

Kablooie Duck: How's your costume?

Phooey Duck:*leaves, returns in costume* I used glitter!

Kablooie Duck:*looks over him* Yea. Huh. It's not scary?

Phooey Duck:*spins* Am I pretty or cute?

Kablooie Duck:*smiles at his toy chainsaw and not paying attention* Sure.

Phooey Duck:*goes back to closet* How many episodes do you think we'll be in?

Kablooie Duck: Well the Phantom Blot one, Penny, the Halloween one, I'm going to be in the impossible bin and Darkwing ones if they like or not.

Phooey Duck:*geasures* Slow down. We can't be in every single episode and we have to think about what's F.O.W.L.'s next appearance. We need to think about the risks.

Kablooie Duck: Hmmmmm. *thinking* Okay, so The Phantom and The Sorcress will involve FOWL. It's also a Lena and Webby episode so it's possible we won't be in the plot unless we make ourselves a part of it.

Phooey Duck:*points out* There's a scene with The Blot in our house from the other world and a few showing our family so we will be in the plot for a short time.

Kablooie Duck:*goes to change back* That's a good point to enter if they doesn't make us main plot.

Phooey Duck:*nods* Ye! But if we have a split plot, You deal with the fighting and I do magic or whatever.

Kablooie Duck:*thumb up* Got it. The Penumbra episode seems like a down episode but good for character development. We might not have a choice on skipping it.

Phooey Duck:*thinks for a moment then notes* We can do a filler episode but we need to learn and grow as people. *pokes him* That means you too, Hotshot.

Kablooie Duck:*waves him off* Sure, sure. Love, friendship, family. Whatever. *grumbles* I hope Penny fights me.

Phooey Duck:*gets Episode title list* Now The Trickening. We are going to that, we even got costumes.

Kablooie Duck:*thinking about scaring people and laughing villainously*

Phooey Duck:*looks at him*

Kablooie Duck:*stops, embarrassed smile* Don't worry. I won't do anything bad. *fingers crossed behind back*

Phooey Duck: I hope not. *looks to episode list* The Impossibin seems important but if nothing happens, we can skip.

Kablooie Duck:*casually* I'm going just to kill Scrooge.

Phooey Duck:*glares* Kablooie! I swear I will tell!!

Kablooie Duck:*checks list* Let's get Dangerous is an hour long. That's got to be important and I for one am excited about this in particular.

Phooey Duck:*worried* Well if Negaduck won't be there then it's up in the air what's next.

Kablooie Duck:*chanting cheer* HYPE! Hype! HYPE! Woooooooooooooooo!

Phooey Duck:*scratching head* The foundation of youth will after that? Rockerduck will be there, with Goldie and Scrooge. But it seems like we won't be able to go.

Kablooie Duck: Ah... *stressed* We will already be in so many episodes, how are we supposed to go on this to check on FOWL?

Phooey Duck: Maybe we need to cut down on the episodes or take turns?

Kablooie Duck:*shakes head* No no no, there's a bunch where we both have to show up. Then there's a massive if on the Impossible Bin, we might not have a choosing future. F.O.W.L didn't do SHIT first part of season three so they'll be coming down hard at some point.

Phooey Duck:*confused* They did do things, they started a capture order on me.

Kablooie Duck: It's Huey's season. He's supposed to figure out everything about FOWL and do the character development. *breathes out* The Buzzard Brothers have to pull something big in front of him.

Phooey Duck:*cheerfully* We know stuff! We can help. I'm sure Huey will need support to prove FOWL exists. We got plenty of proof, getting the adults to help won't be hard especially since Kildare Coot discovered them. Heck, Fethry was with me and Kildare so he knows everything!

Kablooie Duck:*sad* Phooey, Huey has to have a conflict with an adult. Besides nobody believes Fethry or Kildare. Our proof means nothing, they'll just say we are kids.

Phooey Duck:*sad* But they'll believe Huey right? He's so smart.

Kablooie Duck: I thought so too but this is a season antagonist, we won't stop them until the end.

Phooey Duck: Oh. *scared* We have a long time. With The Scary Vultures?

Kablooie Duck: I heard there's a rumor that this season ends in a court battle. Our proof helps in the end. We have to keep finding more. *lights match, puts in bill* And we have to keep up with them to get there. Make sure with every move they don't get ahead, that their goals are paused long enough for Scrooge's lawyers or whatever to stop them.

Phooey Duck:*shaking* I know what their goals are already. *breathes in* They intend to take you, me, Huey, and steal the world.

*black screen, a countdown on 11*


	17. The Waiting Time Part 16.

Phooey Duck: Kablooie, how many days until the next episode?

Kablooie Duck:*counts the paper chain that Phooey made* 10 days.

Phooey Duck:*surprised* That's so soon! But I still feel like it's so boring to wait.

Kablooie Duck:*points out* Well we only have 10 days until our non canon actions are over. So maybe we should be asking what we want to do if there's no long-term backlash.

Phooey Duck:*thinking aloud* I didn't consider that. Now I kinda wish I had more time to decide what to do. Given that everything we do will be undone by canon and such.

Kablooie Duck: What would you do if there's no backlash from it?

Phooey Duck: Huh, What would you do, Bwudda Kablooie?

Kablooie Duck:*stares into nothing then replies* I'd like a bunny rabbit to pin me down, kiss me all over, and call me pet names.

Phooey Duck:*shocked* Kablooie! That's naughty! How could you be so lewd!?

Kablooie Duck:*puts hands on hips and glares* Oh yeah? What would you do Mr. Innocent?

Phooey Duck:*bluntly* I'd start a band like Unca Donald Duck did but with my past lives, you gross icky.

Kablooie Duck: Oh. *puzzled* Is that all you'd do?

Phooey Duck: No. Is That you'd do?

Kablooie Duck: No.

Phooey Duck:*excited* Tell me what else you would do then!

Kablooie Duck:*angry* No, it's embarrassing.

Phooey Duck:*notes* You just told me that you like being held down by bunnies. I don't think there's anything you need to be embarrassed of beyond that.

Kablooie Duck:*partly lying* I'd like to go on a date with a bunny and for them to...

Phooey Duck:*crosses arms* That's something you can do as an adult or an older teen with little backlash. Don't lie!

Kablooie Duck:*bold faced lie* I want to kiss a girl.

Phooey Duck:*still crossed armed, glares*

Kablooie Duck:*huffs while embarrassed* Fine, I want to hug Louie and tell him I love him.

Phooey Duck:*cocks eye* But you always kill Louie in video games and punch him and stand over his bed staring at him while making strange vague threats at night and tell him if you become a villain that you would use him as a damsel in distress and drink all the Pep in the house just to hurt him and say that you hate him.

Kablooie Duck:*rages* I don't!

*Flashback*

*Everyone is playing videogames*

*In Minecraft*

Louie Duck:*worried* Hey Guys, I think there's a problem. My everything is on fire.

Kablooie Duck:*in the distance, herding Creepers to Louie* ♪Kill the Louie, Kill the Louie♪

Louie Duck:*fear* Oh God, What is that?

Webby Vanderquack:*shocked* It's possible to herd Creepers!? I've got to tell Lena!!

Huey Duck:*horrified* It's.. It's not actually possible.

*In Among Us*

Louie Duck:*doing a task in electric*

Kablooie Duck:*pops out of vent and kills him immediately*

Phooey Duck:*reports a body*

Kablooie Duck: ****!

*in Legends of Legendsquest*

Louie Duck: I've got gold! Ha!

Kablooie Duck:*appears out of nowhere* Die. *pushes him into lava and leaves*

*in a fighting game*

Louie Duck:*just causally playing a fighting game*

Kablooie Duck:*takes Dewey's controller and beats him to death in game, leaves*

Dewey Duck:*coming back from the bathroom* I won?

*in Animal Crossing*

Louie Duck:*proudly* Ha, just trying killing me in this Kablooie.

Kablooie Duck:*unleashes the spiders* I won't >:) as long you don't move.

*in some other game*

Louie Duck: Anyways, I am sure Kablooie doesn't play this.

Kablooie Duck:*walking up to Louie with an ax* Wrong.

*just a normal drive in the car*

Kablooie Duck:*sees a car, points to car excitedly* Red punch buggy!! *punches Louie*

Louie Duck: Ow! Mom, Kablooie punched me!!

Della Duck:*yells* Don't punch your brother or I'm turning this car around!

*just a normal day at the house*

Louie Duck:*taking a nap*

Kablooie Duck:*walks up to him* Wakey wakey fucker. *punches his shoulder*

*normal day in the house boat*

Louie Duck: There's no way Kablooie will come to somewhere in water.

Kablooie Duck:*from behind him* Wrong again, dim bulb. *punches him*

*a night before an adventure*

Louie Duck:*wakes up*

Kablooie Duck:*standing over his bed*

Louie Duck:*wide eyed*

Kablooie Duck:*gets closer* One day, I will put sand in your bed. *goes under his bed*

*a normal night*

Louie Duck:*puts away phone to charge it, sees Kablooie*

Kablooie Duck:*standing on the foot of his bed, kinda not there because he drunk coffee then ate sleeping pills* If you don't go to sleep, I will eat your feathers.

*the night before something*

Louie Duck:*can't sleep because he had coffee*

Kablooie Duck:*crawls onto the bottom of Dewey's bed then looks at him* Pick a God and pray, little tin man.

Louie Duck:*scared* Why?

Kablooie Duck:*grins a little too wide, voice sounds like thousands of clicking beatles* We are going to watch John Carpenter's The Thing.

*normal dinner*

Louie Duck: No, I'm totally the Evil Triplet.*eats a apple slice*

Kablooie Duck:*pauses his eating steak, annoyed* Louie, I will rope you to a log in a sawmill if I ever become a villain. *goes back to violently ripping and tearing the steak with his hands and teeth*

Della Duck:*worried* Kablooie, please use a fork and don't threaten your brother.

*while watching TV*

Louie Duck:*complaining* What kind of villain nowadays ties someone to train tracks?

Kablooie Duck*lights a match and eats it* I will to you if I turn to the dark side, now shut the FUCK up.

*one day*

Louie Duck: Where's the Pep?

Kablooie Duck: I drank it.

Louie Duck:*bafflement* Why?

Kablooie Duck:*sadistic* Because it would hurt you. Also to show domance.

*another normal day*

Louie Duck:*sprays Kablooie with water*

Kablooie Duck:*gets on all fours, hissing like cat* I hate you!!

Louie Duck:*sprays him again*

*return to now*

Kablooie Duck: That doesn't count!


	18. The Waiting Time Part 17.

Phooey Duck:*waves* Hey Kablooie! 9 days until The Phantom and The Sorcress, what'd do today?

Kablooie Duck:*sad* I hugged Louie and told him that I love him because he's my brother but I don't think he understood.

*Flashback*

Louie Duck:*napping on the couch*

Kablooie Duck:*goes up to him, hugs him* I love you, Louie.

Louie Duck:*wakes up, panicking* Mom! MOM! Kablooie is trying to hurt me again!!

Kablooie Duck:*cuddles him* No, I love you. Please, You are my brother.

Louie Duck:*sprays him with water* Liar!

Kablooie Duck:*backs away, on all fours, hissing like a cockroach*

Louie Duck: Do you think I'm stupid enough to believe that when all you ever do is hurt me?! *sprays him again*

Kablooie Duck:*hissing louder in threat, runs away like a cockroach on the ceiling*

*return*

Kablooie Duck:*rubs back of head* Yeahhh. Maybe repeatedly going out of my way to harm him emotionally, socially, psychologically, spiritually, physically, and all that every single day has broken our relationship beyond repair.

Phooey Duck:*hurt* Ow, I couldn't begin to understand how much that hurts.

Kablooie Duck:*weak smile* So how was your day?

Phooey Duck: The band worked out but we got into a fight and became one hit wonders. Also Gyro's thing broke.

*Flashback*

Phooey Duck:*playing the drums as crowds cheer*

*Time Skip*

Phooey Duck:*with tears* You don't care about the music, all you two care about is the money and the fame!

*Time Skip*

Phooey Duck:*drinking a big bottle of root beer and crying in a tub* He never loved me!! He lied! He lied to my face!

*Time Skip*

Phooey Duck:*pokes* You don't talk about him that way! You don't know our relationship. You know nothing, Mr. All Seeing Eye!

(Figure unseen but voiced by Alex Hirsch): You don't get to tell me what I know, Pip Squeak!!

(Another figure voiced by Alex): I'm the only one who speaks to him that way so Shut UP! The fans love me more than you because I'm cute.

(Unseen Figure): He's just using you, do you even know how old he is? You Are 12, kiddo!

Phooey Duck:*rage* I'VE BEEN ALIVE IN TOTAL OF 83 YEARS! You *breaks down sobbing*

*Time Skip*

Phooey Duck:*drinking soda at a bar* I just wanted to be loved. *cries*

*Time Skip*

Phooey Duck:*sadly* We are breaking up the band.

*Time Skip*

Phooey Duck:*crying on The invention that Gyro gave him*

The Thing:*breaks*

Phooey Duck:*stressed* Gyro won't like this.

*Return*

Kablooie Duck: That sounds deeply traumatic.

Phooey Duck: It was but I think things will be better.

Kablooie Duck: It's 2020, nothing will get better.

Phooey Duck: Why are you like this?


	19. The Waiting Time Part 18.

Phooey Duck:*laying back* Only eight days.

Kablooie Duck:*nods* 8 I almost can't believe it's so close.

Phooey Duck:*sad* Do you miss the old world?

Kablooie Duck:*thinks* Yeah, sure.

Phooey Duck:*kicking feet* I do.

Kablooie Duck: I don't even remember it other than vague dreams. They come to me whatever something happens.

Phooey Duck:*closes eyes* I remember the before worlds. I remember the times before.

Kablooie Duck:*puts a lit matchstick in his bill*I can almost remember being myself but it's so far away and dim. I'm not sure if I was ever a person with thoughts back then.

Phooey Duck:*breathes out* We weren't. We were all one. You, me Dewey, Huey, Louie. It was right.

Kablooie Duck:*stares at the sky* I remember fire. A camp fire, you and Huey and Dewey and Louie and me were Woodchucks. 

Phooey Duck:*opens eyes and looks to the sky* Would you like to hear who you were?

Kablooie Duck:*breathes out smoke* I'm not sure. I don't want to know if my personhood is a monkey paw.

Phooey Duck:*comforting* You could have just changed. We don't know how those things even work.

Kablooie Duck: I don't want to find out that I wasn't me. That my individual self is just... *trying to hold back tears* I want be valid and real.

Phooey Duck:*pats back* I don't understand but I think you are as real as anyone else because you are my brother. *sighs* Maybe I should just tell you how I think of it all, I don't care if anything is real or if I have personhood. There's just things we'll never understand.*shrugs*

Kablooie Duck:*looks sad* I do care, Phooey. I want to be of worth, vaild, real, and... *curls up and turns on his side* Would you believe that I pretend to not feel pain so I have a reason to not feel anything?

Phooey Duck:*hugs him* You should feel things, Kablooie. Pain is human. I love you.

Kablooie Duck:*hugs back* Thanks Phooey.

Phooey Duck:*smiles* Welcome bwudda.


	20. The Waiting Time Part 19.

Phooey Duck: 7 days... I'm almost scared.

Kablooie Duck:*confused* Scared?

Phooey Duck:*notes* Well Yeah! We will be going against The Blot and Magica.

Kablooie Duck:*worried* Oh yeah...

Phooey Duck:*sad* Ye. I hope things will work out.

Kablooie Duck:*assures* They will, we are a Disney Cartoon. They have to... 

Phooey Duck:*afraid* What if this isn't even the beginning? What if things are about to get so much worse?

Kablooie Duck:*pats him* Now now. We are tougher than anything they can throw.

Phooey Duck:*hurt* I don't think I am.

Kablooie Duck:*panicking* Hey! How about you help me with something?

Phooey Duck:*curious* What?

Kablooie Duck:*grins evilly* You are going to help me with Louie.

*Time Skip*

Phooey Duck:*peers around* There's Louie.

Kablooie Duck:*looks* There he is.

Louie Duck:*watching TV*

Phooey Duck:*walks* Follow my lead.

Kablooie Duck:*awkwardly following*

Louie Duck:*drinking a Pep*

Phooey Duck:*hugs Louie* I wuv you, Big Bwudda Louie!

Kablooie Duck:*also hugs him* Big Baby.

Louie Duck:*panicking* What?! What's going on!?

Kablooie Duck:*cuddling him* I love baby brother. Big baby.

Louie Duck:*shoves him* I am older than you!!

Phooey Duck:*snuggles him* Big Bwudda, Do you love us?

Kablooie Duck:*kisses his forehead* Big baby. Cutie Pie, baby brother. I love Snuggle Bunny. *nuzzles him*

Louie Duck:*pushes him away* No! I don't love Kablooie. Don't call me that. I am your older brother.

Phooey Duck:*holds him tight* Don't fight Kablooie, Bwudda. He is trying to be there for you.

Louie Duck: He has done nothing but hurt me, Phooey.

Kablooie Duck:*picks up Louie and cradles him* Baby. Big baby brother.

Louie Duck:*scared* MOM! HELP!!

Phooey Duck:*stands on Kablooie's shoulders* No, please you have to listen.

Louie Duck:*struggling against Kablooie to get away*

Kablooie Duck:*gets angry* If you don't want my love as a brother then I will give what you expect. *throws him against the couch*

Phooey Duck:*trying to hold Kablooie Duck back* No! Kablooie stop it!!

Kablooie Duck:*stops, leaves*

*a different room*

Dewey Duck:*trying to style his hair*

Kablooie Duck:*slams open the door, grins wickedly* IT'S KABLOOIE TIME!!

Dewey Duck:*screaming as crawling backwards*

Phooey Duck:*trying to stop him* No, Kablooie, No!

Kablooie Duck:*grabs Dewey* I need to blow off a little steam, You can take it right Dewey?

Dewey Duck:*trying to get away*

Kablooie Duck:*glares at him, drops him* Coward.

Dewey Duck:*runs*

Phooey Duck:*baffled and scared* Kablooie, what was that?

Kablooie Duck:*balls up hands* What? It's not like I do anything different any other day.

Phooey Duck:*doesn't understand* Kablooie, you were going to hurt him.

Kablooie Duck:*angry* Yeah? And Louie didn't even give me a chance. Nobody ever will. They just think I'm a bad guy!

Phooey Duck:*backs away* I gave you a chance. I didn't think you were bad.

Kablooie Duck:*turns away* Now you are scared of me, now you think I'm a baddie.

Phooey Duck:*reaches for him* Kablooie. No.

Kablooie Duck:*turns away* No. They are right, I'm only full of violence and fire! *runs*

The End.


	21. The Waiting Time Part 20.

Phooey Duck:*walks over to Kablooie* Kablooie?

Kablooie Duck:*eating meat in the fridge, snarls*

Phooey Duck: Kablooie, you have to come out.

Kablooie Duck:*hissing*

Phooey Duck:*wraps arms around him* You seem cold.

Kablooie Duck:*sneezes and shakes*

Phooey Duck:*slowly gets him out* You should get warm. Here, I'll get you that meat.

Kablooie Duck:*hugs him and shakes*

Phooey Duck:*wraps a heat blanket around him* There there.

Kablooie Duck:*sad* I tried to beat up Dewey and Huey but Webby accidentally shoved me into the fridge.

Phooey Duck:*pats him carefully* Please don't beat up Huey or Dewey.

Kablooie Duck:*pulls in the blanket* Cold.

Phooey Duck:*cuddles him* It's okay. The blanket will heat up soon.

Kablooie Duck:*sniffles* I don't understand why I hurt people I love.

Phooey Duck:*cuddles him up warmly* You don't hurt me. Listen, I found some people you might like to hear about.

Kablooie Duck:*holds him back* Who?

Phooey Duck:*shows a photo* April, May, June.

Kablooie Duck:*takes photo* I haven't seen them since the old world...

Phooey Duck:*points out* Daisy is already dating Donald. We might see them.

Kablooie Duck:*tired* I'm so sleepy. Can I have that meat?

Phooey Duck:*puts a plate of meat in front of him* Sure thing.

Kablooie Duck: Do you think Daisy will be in the coming episodes?

Phooey Duck:*frowns* I don't think so. *smiles a little bit* Maybe she is.

Kablooie Duck:*eating meat*

Phooey Duck:*sits down*

Kablooie Duck:*yawns* I'm sleeply.

Phooey Duck:*holds him* It's okay.

Kablooie Duck:*lays on Phooey and falls asleep*

Phooey Duck:*puts him on table* Shhhhhhh, Night night.

Kablooie Duck:*sleeping noises*

Phooey Duck:*thinking aloud quietly* Now I have to talk to Huey, Dewey, and Louie.

6 days remaining

The End.


	22. The Waiting Time Part 21.

Phooey Duck:*walking in the room* Hey 5 days until the next... *pauses*

Huey Duck:*whispering in fear* Help.

Dewey Duck:*panicked whispering* Kablooie is asleep on us!

Louie Duck:*points to Kablooie*

Kablooie Duck:*cuddling them in his sleep*

Phooey Duck:*goes over to him* Don't worry about it. Like I said before, he just loves you and gets violent when refused love.

Huey Duck:*Panicked* Going immediately to violence isn't a reasonable reaction. I don't want to be harmed so get him off. 

Phooey Duck:*cocks eye* I know he should fix his behavior instead expecting everyone else to conform to it but are any of you surprised that he acts this way when you spray him like a cat?

Louie Duck:*miffed* I didn't think about that when he goes around hurting me all the time.

Dewey Duck:*crosses arms* Yeah, he beats me up and drags me into dark rooms to talk about weird stuff.

*flashback*

Dewey Duck:*walking to get popsicle*

Kablooie Duck:*jumps him*

Dewey Duck:*screaming and struggling*

Kablooie Duck:*snarls, gets on all fours, picks him up by the scruff with toothy bill, runs into a dark room while dragging him*

Dewey Duck:*screaming and clawing to get away during this*

Kablooie Duck:*closes door, lets him go, causal talking voice* Tell me what Tik Tok is.

*return*

Phooey Duck:*puts hands on hips* Well he was trying to connect with you but the only thing he connects with is arson and violence.

Louie Duck:*points out* He doesn't threaten you. What would you know about how he treats us?

Phooey Duck:*dull tone* He doesn't threaten me because I'm clear with the fact I can't fight back and I give him the love that he gives me. You know like a brother does.

Huey Duck:*confused* Wait, what is in five days?

Phooey Duck:*remembers how Huey reacted to the 4th wall in Quack Pack, stressed and faking a smile* Nothing you need to worry about.

Kablooie Duck:*hugs them while grumbling about murdering anyone who hurts his brother*

Phooey Duck:*excited* See, he loves you!

Huey, Dewey, and Louie Duck:*at the same time* I don't feel loved right now, I feel unsafe. *at each other* Stop copying me!!

Phooey Duck:*miffed* Ah, I wanted to be a hivemind!

The End


	23. The Waiting Time Part 22.

Phooey Duck:*walks into the room* 4 days until... *nervous* Oh hi Louie.

Louie Duck:*points, panicking* He's on me.

Kablooie Duck:*monstrous animal like snores*

Phooey Duck:*sits down* Don't worry, Big Bwudda Louie.

Louie Duck:*crosses arms* How would you know? You agree with him that murder is a display of love.

Phooey Duck:*teary-eyed, baffled* No I don't. Why would you think that?

Louie Duck:*points out* You said that him saying that he wanting to murder people means he loves us.

Phooey Duck:*cocks eye* And I said the only way he interacts with the world outside of me is violence. That is a sign he loves you.

Louie Duck:*miffed* He shouldn't be like that! *more quietly* Him wanting to do violence at all times is BAD.

Phooey Duck:*puts hands on hips* Like I don't know that?

Kablooie Duck:*hugs Louie, nuzzles him* Snuggle Bunny, baby brother. 

Louie Duck:*anxiety*

Phooey Duck:*notes* You are one of his favorite.

Louie Duck:*sighs* He called me a "Snuggle Bunny" Phooey.

Phooey Duck: What's wrong with that?

Louie Duck:*opens a photo and shows the lock screen* This is pin up of a bunny. *unlocks phone* Also pin up of a bunny. If mom saw this on his phone, she'd take away everyone's phone.

Phooey Duck:*blushing and hiding eyes*

Louie Duck:*remembers Phooey doesn't know what sex is* Oh yeah, *stressed fear* please don't remember this.

Kablooie Duck:*starts to wake up due to Phooey being under distress*

Phooey Duck:*calms down*

Kablooie Duck:*goes to sleep*

Phooey Duck:*explains* Kablooie isn't interested in kissy kissy with you. *scared* He calls you bunny and baby when he looks at those lewd pictures because he views people he can harm likeable.

Louie Duck:*uncomfortable* What is that supposed to mean, Phooey?

Phooey Duck:*unsure how to say this* He likes you and those pictures differently but he likes bunnies and you for alike reasons.

Louie Duck:*sweats* I think I know where this is going and I don't like it.

Phooey Duck:*sad* He likes the idea of prey and people he can hurt.

Louie Duck:*surprised but still doesn't like this* I didn't expect that but that's still Yicks.

Phooey Duck:*trying to be comforting* How about I teach you something? I can teach you how to pet Kablooie.

Louie Duck:*unsure* Are you sure we should pet Kablooie? He seems like his might bite my hand off.

Phooey Duck: Watch, you'll understand. *pets Kablooie*

Kablooie Duck:*wags tail and makes happy carnivorous duck noises*

Louie Duck:*laughing* Oh my God. It's like a giant murderous puppy.

Phooey Duck:*scratches Kablooie behind the ear*

Kablooie Duck:*wags tail harder and thumping webbed foot in excitement*

Louie Duck:*filming this on his phone, tries replaying it but Phooey being in the video glitches it* Damn it, I forgot you were in the frame.

Phooey Duck:*cheerfully* Would you like to see more?

Louie Duck:*nods* I've literally never seen him like this and it's hilarious.

Phooey Duck:*ruffles his hair* 

Kablooie Duck*turns over with a big dumb smile*

Louie Duck:*laughs* Oh my freaking God, it's adorable.

Phooey Duck:*smiles* Maybe don't laugh at Kablooie, he's sensitive.

Louie Duck:*looks to Phooey* We should show everyone.

Phooey Duck:*frowns* Maybe don't laugh at him. He's sensitive about things.

Louie Duck:*rolls his eyes* Sure sure, he's just so cute like this.

Kablooie Duck:*rolls over and cuddles around Louie*

*°☆~Time Skip~☆°*

Phooey Duck: This is how to pet a Kablooie. *pets Kablooie*

Kablooie Duck:*wags tail*

Dewey Duck:*shocked*

Huey Duck:*studies in surprise*

Louie Duck:*smiles softly*

Webbigal Vanderquack:*wide eyed in adore* Dawwwww. 

Phooey Duck:*bows* I hope you understand Kablooie a little more 

The End.


	24. The Waiting Time Part 23.

Phooey Duck and Kablooie Duck:*dancing in a circle* ♪ 2 days, two days!♩ 

Phooey Duck:*chuckles* I feel a retcon.

Kablooie Duck:*shocked* What?

Phooey Duck: The Blot is going to be... *smiles* Medevil. Kablooie, you'll relate a lot to him.

Kablooie Duck:*worried* I relate to most villains, Phooey.

Phooey Duck:*cheerfully singing* ♫ Burn the witch♬

Kablooie Duck:*panicking as he is swung in a circle* Phooey!

Phooey Duck:*pauses and looks around* What happened?

Kablooie Duck:*looks to the unmagic box* The Canon is coming.

Phooey Duck:*hugs him* Bwudda Kablooie, how did your travels into dark magics go?

Kablooie Duck:*dark rage gently boiling* Not well, be happy you are not actually magical. *frowns* Your powers can't be understood under the frame of magic.

Phooey Duck:*cocks head* You seem miffed.

Kablooie Duck:*anger and distrust* All my work in magic has taught me is not to trust magic and that I don't understand it.

Phooey Duck:*sees unmagic box* Ummm. That's not... What about Lena?

Kablooie Duck:*turns away* What good has magic ever done for Lena? Given her a life as a slave under a Aunt who never loved her? Trapped her in that godless pit? *punches wall without breaking it* Made her afraid of herself?!

Phooey Duck:*shaking and stepping away from Kablooie* We know plenty of people who are magical and they aren't all bad or suffering. Please reconsider this view, Bwudda Kablooie.

Kablooie Duck:*points out* I am Magic, Phooey!! That damn monkey paw brought me here and made me like this!

Phooey Duck:*attempts to calm him down* Listen, this is an extreme take on magic. Maybe you need to time to let this flash fire cool down and carefully think.

Kablooie Duck:*opens the unmagic box* I've collected all this anti magic stuff, and soon I can destroy magic from the face of the earth.

Phooey Duck:*scared* We talked about this, no villain monologs!

Kablooie Duck:*villain laughing as planning murder*

Phooey Duck:*mildly miffed* I'm gonna tell mom if you try to kill anyone. I mean it.

Kablooie Duck:*still laughing as he lights matchstick*

Phooey Duck:*leaving* I'm telling mommy.

Kablooie Duck:*stops, smoking match* Phooey, come back. I'm sorry to scare you but I'm right.

Phooey Duck:*little angy huffs* You are acting like a big dumb meanie weenie beans!

Kablooie Duck:*crosses arms* No, I'm not!

Phooey Duck:*angy* You are. You meanie beans dum dum because you are like no brains who burns people that disagree with you.

Kablooie Duck:*breathes out smoke* Oh so when it's convenient for you, I am big smart brave strong tough but then I'm the bad guy?!

Phooey Duck:*pokes his chest* You need to stop suddenly deciding that all one thing is bad and deserves to all die. One of these days, you are going to burn down everything you love trying to get rid of witches and wolves.

Kablooie Duck:*shoves his hand away* Well maybe I'm right. Huh? Maybe my way is right and I can make everyone else see it because I have the might.

Phooey Duck:*mild fuming* Then make me agree with you with your muscles, butthead.

Kablooie Duck:*shakes head* No, softie.

Phooey Duck:*stands soild* Then you aren't right. You have no right to make anyone else see it your way with your might.

Kablooie Duck:*grabs Phooey and pulls him in* Oh?! How about this, a bet. You go that way and I go mine then at the end of this season we decide. Winner gets whatever they choose at the end of the bet.

Phooey Duck:*glares* Bet.

The End.


	25. The Final

One day. In one day this all will end. Tomorrow, the season will begin again. Given how it's fall, it is traditional to tell a scary story for the coming October. So I have something horrific. Something I hope you will understand. It is a common plot point that Phooey has a nightmare but I don't think too many people fully understand what Phooey goes through during such horrors. I'm going to show you so you can understand.

Warning for Nightmares, Sleep Paralysis, and Pedo.

Nightmare 1.

The alternate reunion/meeting

Phooey Duck sat in the meeting room in the chair at the end of the table. Scrooge McDuck had been gone for a while. Phooey was scared, the three vultures stared at him. The eyes drilled into his soul with hate and rage. Whenever he looked away, the feeling of eyes watching still. Then the middle vulture spoke up, "Do you know how many years it has been?" The tone was like acid. The fourth triplet pushed back into the chair in fear, he shaked in confusion and fight, "What are you talking about?" The Buzzard Brothers looked among each other then the middle one stood up.

The suited vulture stood at his chair and rambled on, "I've been waiting for you for a very long time. Just thinking of what I'd say or what I would do." The adult start walking closer. Phooey yelled, "Unca Scrooge!" The bald vulture chuckled as he got something out of his pocket, "He won't get here for a while. Anyhow, I guess I'm being a little bit nostalgic. Remember this?" There was a mistletoe in his hand, it was dangled around above the little boy. The child questioned in confusion, "That's Mistletoe, right?" The adult man held his cheek as a grin grew. The kid shoved his hand away and sobbed, "No, no touch. Go away you big, scary, dumb, meanie weenie beans!"

The corpus eater darkly chuckled as he shoved a hand under the yellow sweater. The yellow beanie shouted as he uselessly slapped and kicked at the hand but this did nothing. The hand felt down and down then rubbed hard but still on the stomach. The Holly berries was placed on the beak. The scavenger delighted like a predator on toying with it's prey, "I could never stay angry with you. You are so... I find this word so unprofessional but Adorable. I have always hated children but you are so adorable." Each adorable dripped with a tar like lust. Something thick and dark and trapping and drowning.

The yellow duckling sobbed hard, "Stop it, no more touchy. I don't like it!" The villain pinned down his legs and arms. The mistletoe remained balanced as the older man moved his head down to eye level with the young preteen. The supervillain tuned happily, "Awwww, look who's under the mistletoe." His words sounded like someone who's never said anything in a non business professional tone. The older vulture kissed his forehead and then his bill. The preteen struggled and tears poured out. The monster smiled and he breathes out, "You look so cute when you cry."

Nightmare 2.

Sleep Paralysis

Phooey Duck opened his eyes and looked around. He attempted to get up but couldn't. Phooey laid there, looking at the ceiling. Slowly by slowly the ceiling was decorated in Christmas decor. Mainly mistletoe. The yellow sweater went wide eyed as he tried to get up. It still didn't work. The yellow beanie heard something horrifically familiar. The yellow duckling looked down and saw them. Their form was shadowy and vauge but he knew who they three were. The Buzzard Brothers stood at the foot of his bed. Bradford Buzzard began, "We decided to come early."

The suited vultures walked up close to him. Bradford continued, "You knew this was coming." The yellow triplet whimpered as he realized exactly what was about to happen. The middle vulture got on the bed and got closer as he poured salt into the wounds, "Aw, a gift all wrapped up in a neat bow ready for me to "unwrap."" The villain then laughed as the other two joined him, their dark forms leered ever closer as they twisted into something fitting their souls. Hellish as the claws dug in to force the innocent closer for their hungry maws so dripping. Even drooling for their craven appetite.

Nightmare 3.

Groom

Phooey Duck saw the mirror before him. It was him but wrong. This was all too common with himself and mirrors. They never seemed to reflect the image of the living error. The problem now was that they did. He wore a suit and tie, all dolled up for a crowd. The background roured as a speech was made. Phooey felt uncomfortable in his skin as he looked at himself, posing to find a clue.

Then he blinked. The day was dying. He was older. The cloth upon him were gradation wear for high school. The preteen no more, there only a teen. The feeling was so much worse. Sickening. Gross. Dirty. Lacking worth as the time of his use was slipping ever away.

He blinked away tears. There stood an young man adult. The man before the reflection was done up to the tens or nines. I couldn't be sure. The clothes for a college graduation. Phooey touched the mirror and then his face in disbelief. The feeling had faded into a lack of self. It was as if he was a puppet being merely strung along to whichever dance was wanted today. Golden eyes dulled in death before death grew wide in surprise. How could this be him when he was so disconnected from himself? The yellow duck backed away from the mirror as the overflow came on.

That's when he blinked. Phooey Duck shaked as he finally opened his eyes and looked at himself. Expecting some horror beyond. But not. The glitch found horror but it was one he could wrap his head around. The mirror displayed an adult. It was another suit and tie, dolled up for show. However the style of suit told the context which was by itself a horror story. While before, there had been little to no context for these mirror snapshots. Now it was all coming together. The 404 was in a groom suit for a wedding. He blinked again and again but it wouldn't go away.

The setting was seen. A door opened and a very old man stepped inside. The Buzzard walked up to him, grabbing the shoulders. A suit on him as well. The lightening bolt stood solid in fear as he shuttered. The Buzzard unknown but a voice spoke in pride, "Are you done getting ready yet?"

Have you guessed it yet?

I guess it's difficult to tell, after all I couldn't find a way to show you. How about I tell you instead? Each nightmare is based in a daydream or dream of the vultures. For every single night that these monsters gripped for their victim, his powers turmoil the trauma to bring him back to his fear. As often the mind does to such traumas. By tuning into those very dreams like a radio station to static it into nightmares.

The End.

See you tomorrow.


End file.
